| Important lessons can be learned by a | | | | the silent victim (my friend's wife who |
| person's errors in judgment and mistakes. | | | | didn't hear my comments). My friend said |
| Recently I learned from an error in judgment | | | | that it wasn't necessary to apologize to his |
| that I made. The incident occurred when I | | | | wife but I disagreed. I believe that like |
| insulted one of my best friend's wife (not | | | | lies there are two types of harm that can be |
| done intentionally). This set off a journey | | | | committed against another person. The first |
| of internal soul searching on my part.The | | | | type of harm is a direct harm that is |
| incident: While at my friend's house for | | | | committed against another person (like |
| dinner, I made a comment that was directed at | | | | hitting a person). Then there is a silent |
| my friend's wife. She did not hear the | | | | harm that is committed (insulting someone |
| comment but my friend did hear it. He did | | | | behind their back). In this case I committed |
| not say anything (Didn't want to embarrass me | | | | the silent harm that wasn't heard by my |
| in front of her). He knew what I had meant | | | | friend's wife. I felt that out of respect |
| by the comment but was unhappy with what I | | | | for my friend and his wife, I needed to |
| said. It was a very insulting comment. A | | | | apologize to her and ask for forgiveness. |
| few days went by and then my friend | | | | That's exactly what I did.The lessons I |
| confronted me. Initially I resisted. | | | | learned came directly from the teachings of |
| Finally the light bulb went on and I realized | | | | my religion (Judaism). Once a year, we must |
| that my actions were very wrong.So what did I | | | | ask G-d or anyone that we have sinned |
| learn from this incident? I learned that | | | | against, for forgiveness. We are told that |
| even though I try to lead a good and moral | | | | we should act this way throughout the whole |
| life, I'm human and do make mistakes. I must | | | | year.While this exercise was initially very |
| take action not to let the same mistake to | | | | painful, it was extremely rewarding. I was |
| occur again. In this case I admitted | | | | able to learn something about myself. More |
| complete wrong doing to myself with no | | | | importantly, I was able to correct the harm |
| exceptions.I also learned that admitting an | | | | done to both my friend and his wife. I was |
| error to yourself is not enough. You must | | | | able to make sure that there was honesty and |
| make amends for the harm that has been | | | | integrity in our friendship.I would like to |
| caused. In this case, I disrespected my | | | | thank my friend for having the courage and |
| friend by insulting his wife. My resolution | | | | strength to be honest with me and to |
| was to apologize to him and express my | | | | challenge me. I will do my best in the |
| regrets for the comments that were made. I | | | | future to prevent these types of |
| admitted that they were wrong and needless. | | | | incidents.Anthony B. is the founder and owner |
| I asked for his forgiveness.The final lesson | | | | of a news, political and sports commentary |
| that I learned was that I had to apologize to | | | | website. |